The Princess review: Joey King’s ‘rebellious princess’ act has predictable plot with a dash of graphic violence

Even some of King’s impressive action sequences fall abysmally short of saving this bland, uninspired thriller that reeks of lazy writing.

The Princess

Story:

After refusing to marry the powerful nobleman she was betrothed to, The Princess (Joey King) finds herself in dire straits after her would-be husband Julius (Dominic Cooper) imprisons her family and locks her away in a tower. But this princess is definitely no damsel in distress, and takes it upon herself to rescue her family from the clutches of the evil Julius.

Review:

After years of being treated to the age-old stories of damsels in distress, the novelty of seeing a damsel save herself in grittier versions of fairy tales has not worn off. But makers seem to be pushing the limits as to many of such low effort stories they can pass off as ‘empowering’ tales for audiences, and The Princess seems to be one of them.

Right from the very first act, it becomes painfully obvious that the film is a mish-mash of the cliched tropes one can find in stories of ‘rebellious’ princesses who refuse to bow down to restrictive traditions. We have the titular Princess, whose skills seem to border on the superhuman. In addition to her enviable combat skills, The Princess also seems to have the healing capabilities of something out of a comic book rather than fairy tale. We see her dislocate her wrists to escape out of cuffs in one moment, only for them to heal instantly enough for her to punch bad guys with it in the very next moment. The way she ploughs through hordes and hordes of baddies like they were nothing makes one wonder if it is due to the Princess’ incredible fighting prowess or due to the villains’ laughable incompetence. Some of her narrow escapes also feel like something out of a cartoon, as we see some comical ways she bests her foes. The way The Princess substitutes a banana peel for pearls that seem to incapacitate a small army who slip on them makes you fear for the safety of a kingdom, protected by such an idiotic group of troops. The film is rife with such sequences where logic is thrown out the window, quite literally at times in the over-the-top action sequences. Of course, no ‘rebel princess’ story is complete without a scene where the princess rips off her glamorous clothing as a metaphorical way to signify her defiance of constricting traditions, and the film made sure not to skip that cliche either with the rest of them.

The titular protagonist is not the only one who suffers from lazy writing that seems like the writers gave up even before they started. Black-and-white characters without a sliver of depth to them make the cliched and predictable plot as tiring as ever. The evil nobleman’s motivations for his heinous acts are as bland as they come, complete with an equally evil consort to seal the deal. A king and queen who refuse to see things from their daughter’s point of view; and a wise mentor who offers the most generic combat advice, which actually helps the protagonist in the most logic defying way. These cliched tropes weigh down the already uninspired writing that makes the story tiring even before the beginning of the second act. The whole story too moves just as you’d predict it to, and is a disappointing waste of the talents of Joey King and Dominic Cooper.

The only thing that sets the film apart from the plethora of similar tales are the impressive action sequences, however implausible, and its graphic violence. But those unfortunately are too little to save the film from being a complete let down.

Verdict:

With a predictable story, one-dimensional characters and a weak, predictable script, The Princess is a disappointing waste of Joey King and Dominic Cooper’s talents, and offers nothing new to make it stand out.

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Cast and Crew

Joey King

Princess Diana

Self (archival footage)

Tony Blair

Self (archival footage)

Hillary Clinton

Self (archival footage)

Clint Eastwood

Self (archival footage)

Nelson Mandela

Self (archival footage)

Mother Teresa

Self (archival footage)

Colin Powell

Self (archival footage)

Queen Elizabeth II

Self (archival footage)

Prince Andrew

Self (archival footage)